Lord Vishnu's Love Handles by Will Clarke

Author:Will Clarke
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
Published: 2005-07-15T00:00:00+00:00

15

The Evil Kid

“I’m over it,” I say. “Fucking over it.”

“Travis. Let’s talk about this in person.” Debra’s voice streams into my ear from my cell phone.

“I’m over all this Shimmer bullshit. I’m over Ikshu and I’m over being a spook!”

“I really can’t discuss this with you over a cell phone, Travis,” she sings. “You know that.”

“Really nothing to discuss, Debra. I quit.”

“Travis. Please. Let’s talk about this. I love you.”

She’s playing the good spy and dropping weird shit into our conversation. Fuck her. I hope some counterintelligence hears every word of this.

“Please, Travis, let’s have lunch at the temple,” she begs. “How about tomorrow?”

“How about never?” I push the “End” button and throw my cell phone on the passenger seat.

I don’t care if Shimmer did pay me five million dollars, the government doesn’t print enough money for me to hang with a nutbag like Ikshu. And I’ve got news for him; I don’t play games. He’s fucked with the wrong man. I’ll kill his Kalki the destroyer–ass if he even thinks about messing with me or my family. I have no problem, no problem at all, telling those other Shimmer assholes hasta la vista, either. I don’t owe them a goddamn thing. I’ve put up with enough. Now that I’ve got my money, I’ve got zero-fucking-tolerance for freak show bullshit. I’m not their trained monkey. They can kiss my ass good-bye.

And if Shimmer wants to sic the IRS on me, let them. I’ll sing like a fucking canary. My ass will be on 60 Minutes so fast it will make their heads spin. If I have to, I’ll leave the country like some kind of John Grisham character. I’ll go to the Caymans or something. If I have to, I’ll live on the beach and do Shelby under palm trees and raise my kids on coconuts. I have no problem with that at all. Sounds a lot better than dealing with Ikshu and his serial killer worshipping–ass.

From here on out, no one is the boss of me. I’m a free agent.

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